chronicles of she

i used to spend so much time writing, making lists, sorting out my thoughts and feelings, my plans, and my dreams. but the last few years have been different. dust is settling a bit more. i'm more sure of who i am and what i want. i know what it takes for me to be happy and healthy and i know how i feel about situations and relationships.

i've figured out when i'm being treated with respect, when i'm treating others right, and when things are not going the way they should. it's more efficient now. i don't need to spend a bunch of time sorting out my thoughts and feelings because i already know how i feel and what i want even before i meet people or before life even happens.

life lately has been a well-oiled, but enjoyable routine of school, babysitting, grocery shopping, doing the laundry, napping, and cleaning our apartment. i'm concerned that things have become a little too easy and that i'm forgetting to thrive. i'm forgetting to make lists and dream and set goals and big plans. i've been so focused on graduating from college that i've sort of forgotten about everything else.

i'm always bubbling with desires and ideas and dreams, though. they are just simpler lately. instead of spending so much time plotting how i can travel to foreign countries, i've spent more time dreaming about a relaxing sunday afternoon in the park.