why i support same-sex marriage laws and think you should, too, as fellow latter-day saints | PART 1.5 OF 2

i know you all want to hear more from me on this topic, i just know it! this post was unplanned but with all the somewhat unexpected and overwhelming feedback i've received on my recent post in the last 24 hours through comments, facebook, emails, and texts i feel the need to share a post tying up unfinished thoughts and responding to a few comments. this post was thrown together as a blur of all the pressing thoughts in my brain. please be patient with any errors in any of these posts. since this is a post closing some dialogue, and finishing unfinished sentences, i will be closing the comments. feel free to email me if you have anything you truly would like to express. i am open to that.

first off-i am flattered that anyone read the post at all, and i'm extremely impressed with the (mostly) thoughtful and meaningful input i've received.

just a couple of things that i really should have shared to begin with. i do not in any way believe that i have received revelation for the world or for the church. i don't have any feeling in my heart to lead mankind in anyway (even saying that just sounds weird!). the only invitation i am making is for others to take time to pray, study, and ponder this topic with more thoughtfulness and openness than before.

i have a testimony of the prophet and apostles as leaders of our church. i believe God reveals eternal truths to our church leaders that guide us back to Him. this is one of the important pillars of my testimony of the restored gospel. however, i believe even church leaders would say (in an improbable situation but also in the right situation) that their opinion on matters of political or social issues, though extremely influenced by their testimonies of the restored gospel, are just that, opinion. i'm okay with this. i'm also okay with the fact that a large number of you would disagree with me on that. my testimony of the restored gospel and of a living prophet and apostles is firm. do i think it's okay for members to follow church leaders on political matters, even blindly? because there is safety in following the prophet, yes. because the whole point of being mormon is to work with heaven to make choices for yourself, no.

the church is mostly silent on matters of politics because God hasn't revealed His word on the subject, so it's interesting that the church has chosen this political topic to make an official stance. the thesis for many members who are against same sex marriage claim that because the church has made an official stance, it is doctrine; i believe that claim is incorrect. my thought on this: i don't know why church leaders have chosen to make a stance. however, through all of my personal discourse with heaven via prayer and scripture study i feel the stance is incorrect. i hope that doesn't come off all-knowing or arrogant. i am a mormon because all my personal discourse with heaven is green check marks on every doctrine taught by the church and our leaders (does that make any sense?). the spirit has confirmed (most) everything the church teaches to be true, obviously excepting this political topic (and obviously not the doctrinal topic, because i've made it clear that i agree with the church's official doctrine on homosexuality). i follow the prophet simply because what is taught by church leaders is confirmed to me personally through revelation from heaven.

i recently read this talk by president uchtdorf about the search for truth. it. is. amazing. and so relevant to this issue. and the most mormon talk ever given, i swear. to quote some favorite passages,

"I believe that our Father in Heaven is pleased with His children when they use their talents and mental faculties to earnestly discover truth."

"I ask you to spare no efforts in your search to know this truth for yourself--because this truth will make you free."

"It is my prayer that you will seek the truth earnestly and unceasingly, that you will yearn to drink from the fount of all truth, whose waters are pure and sweet, 'a well of water springing up unto everlasting life.'"

the key here is that as mormons, we are strongly encouraged to search for truth, wherever it can be found. and it's quotes like these that i fall hard for this church of mine, hard i tell you. it is how this church was started, with the prayer of a fourteen year old farm boy. joseph smith said, "one of the grand fundamental principles of mormonism is to receive truth, let it come from whence it may." i ended part 1 inviting anyone who read it to pray, study, and ponder on a handful of thought-provoking questions. again, the key is that we should be searching for truth. my prayer is that i can help others be inspired to search, and at times lead others to truth, if i have it.

"Yes, we do have the fulness of the everlasting gospel, but that does not mean that we know everything. In fact, one principle of the restored gospel is our belief that God “will yet reveal many great and important things."

this is president uchtdorf saying that at this time, as children of God, members and leaders alike, we don't know e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g., and basically this quote is the entire basis for part 1. the key is being prepared to receive more light from heaven by showing heaven that you are searching, asking, and ready for it.

"If you follow the Spirit, your personal search for the truth inevitably leads you to the Lord and Savior, even Jesus Christ, for He is “the way, the truth, and the life.” This may not be the most convenient way; it will probably also be the road less traveled, and it will be the path with mountains to climb, swift rivers to cross, but it will be His way—the Savior’s redeeming way."

how well do we tread this path? are we choosing to tread it at all? i hope that as a latter-day saint and an american, i am always on a personal quest for more truth. there have been moments of quiet knowledge that jesus christ lives and that he is my savior. those cherished moments are unmistaken and very meaningful guide posts to me that i am on a correct path. the path of searching and finding. and more searching, and hopefully more finding.

final thoughts.

as much as i obviously support same-sex marriage, and will support all consenting adult americans to have the freedom to marry whom they please, the mormon i am will still be the missionary i always have been and share with those who would like to hear it, my testimony about the gospel of jesus christ. some of your comments sorta made me sick to my stomache a little because you inferred that i am not standing up for what i believe, and the missionary that i am was a little bit heartbroken. i believe it was evelyn beatrice hall who said, "i disapprove of what you say, but i will defend to the death your right to say it." i may spiritually disagree with your choice to marry as a same-sex couple, but i do support your legal right to do it. and the same goes with many other behaviors that i believe are sinful (as taught to me by modern prophets, no less). and this paragraph sums up everything that gives me pride to be an american, gosh dang it.

it is all about expectations. if you expect u.s. law to meet the unchanging, eternal, and universal truths sent to you by the quiet whisperings of the holy ghost, then, as a faithful latter-day saint you will never support same-sex marriage as legal under u.s. law. and if that is you, then i'm admonishing you to do more than just oppose the opening of a strip club near your home. in my opinion, it is hypocritcal to be against same-sex marriage, and not be against the legalization of any behavior that you know is sinful. so yeah, oppose a strip club opening near your home (i hate strip clubs). but then you better be doing what you can to make sure u.s. laws are changed so that even attending a strip club is illegal; and that even smoking a cigarette is illegal, and that goes with using alcohol, and marijuana in colorado, and no american may be allowed to drink coffee. i will look you in the eyes and be disappointed in you if you don't do these things, because that is your moral compass, and you know that is wrong if you don't oppose the legalization of every possible sinful behaviour. and i expect more from you than to sit idly by. and i don't even say this with the least bit of sarcasm. i do expect a lot from those of you in this camp.

but, if you are okay with u.s. law differing from the unchanging, eternal, and universal truths sent to you by the quiet whisperings of the holy ghost, then it is possible for you to support same-sex marriage, and the legalization of many other behaviors that we latter-day saints know to be against God's wishes for His children, like smoking, and drinking, and strip clubs, and the list goes on. because you know that barack obama is the president of this nation, not Jesus Christ. you look forward to the day that He does reign over the earth, but have lower expectations from u.s. law until that day comes.

why i support same-sex marriage laws and think you should, too, as fellow latter-day saints | PART 1 OF 2

NOTE: this post is written by an active, devout mormon for active, devout mormons. and anyone else who cares to read, but post is full of lds jargon. also, positive comments only. debatable and contradictory comments? sure! but contentious, discrespectful, and mean comments will be deleted and are unwelcome (that means you, anonymous!). also, jared neither supports nor rejects my statements, i just thought this photo was somewhat fitting.

i in no way expect to expansively cover every facet of this topic, or even come close to remotely touching on every last conceivable concern or objection to my assertions. i am actually only endeavoring to touch on one main point.

many of you will disagree with me on this entire post, some of you will agree wholly or to some degree, most of you will at least give my words some thought, and some of you will still reject my statements after thinking it over. and that's okay with me. the point of this opening statement is that i realize i'm bringing up an emotionally charged issue, full of deeply rooted feelings and opinions. the last thing i expect this post to do is change anyone's mind. but i hope to open the pathways of new consideration, new ideas, and thoughts you may have never thought before. i have radically changed my opinion on this topic, and it took many prayer, study, and pondering sessions, handfuls of open, honest, and sometimes angry discussions, and an english teacher who did a terrific job of forcing open my mind to something i was sure would never change.

to some degree or another this describes your life: you grew up reading the scriptures as a family on sunday evenings, family home evening on monday nights, mutual on wednesdays, and mom and dad went out for date night on friday nights. you've never even been offered a cigarette in a social setting, a sip of coffee might as well be whiskey, and if someone says, "scripture mastery" your only reply is "which one?". you are the typical latter-day saint.

all your life you've been taught that homosexuality is a sin, and you agree. the family proclamation is your credo, and you're comfortable with that. so when it comes to same-sex marriage being legalized, the answer is obvious: no way.

does this make you a bigot? are you hateful? no way, not at all! you love all people, and you truly strive you empathize with others and accept all people for who they are, and most importantly, you foster a deep love for God's children in your heart. so how could you be off track?

you believe that marriage is sacred and ordained of God. you believe that gender is essential to individual identity and that marriage should be between a man and a woman. family is the purpose of life and is critical to your individual happiness, as well as the foundation of society. without solid families built upon a sturdy foundation of husbands and wives, society will lose it's stability and crumble, as foretold by ancient and modern prophets, as described so explicitly in the family proclamation. you recognize that same-sex marriage will likely eventually be legalized across the U.S., but you only hope it won't happen in your lifetime, or your children's, or your grandchildren's...

you are a latter-day saint, and a dang good one! you love the people around you despite lifestyle differences, weaknesses, shortcomings, and opposing political views (or at least strive really freaking hard to!). you are patient with your friends and loved ones, you offer the benefit of the doubt, you reserve judgment for the heavens.

you believe that the true church of Christ was restored in this last dispensation, and that a current prophet lives on earth. modern apostles and prophets have actively protested the legalization of same-sex marriage, i mean we all witnessed prop 8, right? so why should any faithful latter-day saint, including you, give a second thought to the marital rights of homosexuals, if the living prophet of God and other church authorities are against those rights? i mean, last i checked, the church hasn't repealed their stance since prop 8.

but let me tell you something, you can be both on track and off track at the same time. you can know that homosexuality is a sin and even wish that no same-sex couple would desire to marry, and this is okay. but where our divine understanding about marriage and the Lord's doctrine on homosexuality is not accepted by every other american, we are off track in our expectation of our fellow americans and in our expectation of a law created by man.

here's my idea: this is a civil rights issue. this is america we are talking about, not the kingdom of God. these are civil rights of american citizens on the table, not gospel doctrines. and this question i'm about to ask right here is the real kicker, the question upon which any potential same-sex marriage paradigm shift is contingent:

on any other topic besides same-sex marriage, have you ever expected U.S. law to match your inner belief system?

a few more questions alma-five-style for you to ponder over, pray about, to use in conjunction with your personal scripture study, and mainly to reflect on how they relate to the civil rights of homosexuals in america. here goes:

• when is the last time you (or the church) revolted against current laws legalizing the use of tobacco, alcohol, and strip clubs (to name a few behaviors we LDS people see as sins, that are currently legal for U.S. citizens)?
• when is the last time you expected society at large to match your personal values and standards (separate from this concern)?
• when is the last time the church expected society and current U.S. laws to match our personal values and standards (separate from this concern)?
• as a U.S. citizen who deeply values your own freedoms that are too great to number, can you honestly say that withholding the freedom to marry from a group of people whose inner belief system varies from yours is constitutional?

for me, one of the biggest hurdles to get over in providing my own honest answers to the above questions was the discordant idea that i could politically disagree with church leaders whom i sustain as prophets, seers, and revelators. with some more spiritual research i realized that i can still sustain our leaders as such prophets and have no expectation that our political views need to match. i stopped believing that the political opinions of our church leaders are doctrine. this is where many of you and i will likely stop being in agreement, if we haven't digressed already. i feel it is okay for members to even blindly follow the prophet on political matters, because i do believe there is safety there. however, i feel the political opinions of members that are different from our leaders aren't necessarily wrong, just because they diverge from the church's official stance. in the same breath, i wouldn't draw the same conclusions if a member's doctrinal opinions were different from our leaders.

i am not suggesting that the church is ever going to, or should ever make a change to official doctrinal views on homosexuality and marriage. i am suggesting that individual members need to recognize that the question of same-sex marriage becoming valid in the legal system in the united states is a civil rights issue, entirely separate from true doctrine. there has never been a time in U.S. history when laws were dictated by the mouth of God. think about it!? after the second coming, when earth is politically and ecclesiastically ruled by Jesus Christ, my discussion will be much different. but for now, that is not the case.

so here is my big invitation: will you try, or consider trying to view this as a civil rights issue? would you separate your cherished and wonderful values from your expectations from U.S. law regarding this issue? because you've already done so on many other occasions. will you take time to ponder, search your scriptures, and pray about the questions i posed?